Sharing a cool article about ADHD

I work at an awesome company that provides online training for professionals in the healthcare industry. Sometimes I come across pretty cool articles that highlight mental health, or intellectual or developmental health issues. Today I found a great one. My husband, one of the most intelligent men I know, has ADD (not ADHD, but they do have some similar qualities), so I related in many ways to this writer. If you know someone who has ADD or ADHD, hopefully you can glean something meaningful from it too!



http://www.mamapedia.com/voices/the-upside-of-loving-someone-with-adhd

Daddy's Top 10

Seeing as yesterday was Jeff's first official Father's Day (last year the Bun was still in the Oven), I thought it would be fitting to reflect on some of the things I appreciate about my husband as a dad. So here is Daddy's Top 10, in no particular order.

He doesn't turn his nose up at a diaper change. In fact, when he is home he changes just about all of Baby Cakes' dirty drawers.

He has a sweet bedtime routine that he does nightly with our son. And both of them LOVE it.

He looks for opportunities to have daddy-son outings so Mama can have much-needed "alone time" (aka being able to run errands without lugging 20+ lbs of baby chunk around town).

He regularly tells me what a beautiful woman and mother I am.

He is humble and quick to apologize during tired parent spats.

He swoops in to entertain Baby Cakes when he can tell both baby and mama need a break from each other.

He has a blast finding organic fruits and veggies on sale, and excitedly purees as much baby food as I do!

On top of his normal full-time job and taking amazing care of his family, he stays up late every night working on his MBA in order to better provide for us.

He keeps our fridge stocked with a modest array of white wines as a mommy treat on particularly stressful days.

He loves Jesus more than he loves me or our son, which equips him to love us with a grace and strength beyond his own ability.

Here's to you, Hubby. You're my favorite.

Oh My Cute.

If I have learned anything as a new mommy over the past 7 months, it's this: In order to maintain some level of sanity, you MUST focus on the cute. Your best laid plans will be consistently foiled by perfectly timed projectile vomits, insanely large diaper dumps (how did poop get THERE?), ear-piercing shrieks with no obvious cause or solution, refusals to eat without double-fisting messy baby spoons (how did avocado get THERE?), and so on and so forth.

Case and point, yesterday I was changing a diaper on the way out the door to meet a friend...and my hand sanitizer pump decided to spray liquid fire in a sweeping arc over the changing table and directly into Baby Cakes' eye. After 20 minutes of frantic eye-flushing over the sink, calls to both the pediatrician and then Poison Control, and a good cry on both our parts, we were again ready to head out to our froyo date (though alcohol seemed more appealing than ice cream at that point).

Equally constant in the world of mommyhood, though, are moments of sheer delight and heart melting adorableness. The crooked baby grin with a mouth full of sweet potato, the peal of giggles watching mommy's amazing kitchen dance moves, the sleepy head burrowing into your shoulder, the look of wonder when Baby discovers he can do something he couldn't quite do yesterday.

So to my exhausted, beautiful mama friends still wearing yesterday's spit up laden nursing tank and worn out yoga pants, I propose a choice. Today, let's focus on the cute. Let's take a collected deep breath and remember that all of this mess truly is a beautiful one. And tomorrow morning, on Groundhog Day, let's do it over again. Because these amazing, frustrating, precious, baffling, sweet sweet babies are a gift. And we have a good Giver who provides every bit of strength and joy we ask for. Amen!

The Super In-Laws

On Saturday night Jeff, Baby Cakes and I donned super hero t-shirts to help celebrate our brother-in-law's 40th birthday. Jeff's sweet sister did an amazing job planning the party for family and friends. Here are some fun shots we took.

Brandon and Kristen

Grandma & Grandpa with Brooks

Kristen & Jeff. I LOVE this sibling pic!

Superman and our little TMNT

 

Lynn (Jeff's mom), Nana (Jeff's grandmother), Gordon (Jeff's dad),

Kristen, Brandon, Jeff & me

 

Baby's true super power...

 

Bat Girl + Superman = Teenaged Mutant Ninja Baby

My Relationship with Facebook: It's Complicated.

Instant access isn't always a good thing. In fact, I'm beginning to think it rarely is. I don't believe I have an addictive personality, but some part of me craves constant entertainment. Since the advent of the smart phone, I have slowly but steadily lost the ability to enjoy sitting in silence, or listen to music for the sake of the music, or daydream while sitting in a waiting room at the doctor's office, or give my full concentration to a meal with a friend. My phone is always there, and on that phone lives Facebook. And Instagram. And my favorite news, weather and couponing apps. And Gmail. And Candy Crush. And. And. And. There is never a moment in time when I can't be immediately satisfied by tapping on that bright, inviting screen and delving into the latest articles on my News Feed or  tackling that super tricky level on Bubble Witch Saga.

None of the things I've just listed are inherently "bad." It's wonderful to have a myriad of ways to connect with family and friends, and to enjoy little mental challenges like which candy to switch next. The problem lies in the fact that one small electronic device can so easily consume a significant portion of my day. I've noticed this acutely since I've become a mom. Even though I often struggle to balance work and childcare, I am somehow on Facebook more than ever before. I'm sure some of that has to do with the ridiculous number of photos I snap on my phone and immediately upload to my wall (sorry not sorry, first time mom here), but it's also become much too easy to peruse my News Feed while nursing, or rocking Baby Cakes to sleep, or sitting in a parked car passing time while he finishes an impromptu nap.

I love Facebook for the connection to family and friends it affords. How else would I keep up with how my friends' adorable children are growing, and what fun things my extended family living all over the country are up to? I hate Facebook for feeding my desire to compare my life to everyone else's - my body, my mind, my kid, my husband, my faith. As a wise woman once told me, "Comparison is the root of all inferiority." Thanks, Mom. You are so totally right.

And thus, the complicated relationship status Facebook and I share. I've decided that there are much more life-giving and productive things I can do with my precious time than fuel my insecurities or stuff my head with wholly unsatisfying pop culture news. I'm not saying Facebook is evil or you should purposefully drop your smart phone into the toilet bowl. I am saying that in this season of my own life, it's become an unhealthy addiction. And I challenge you to do some introspection and see if there's something in your life that's doing the same kind of life-sucking to you.

I'll check in once in a while. After all, that Durham Mommies Helpline and Triangle Mommies Swap Shop are pretty amazing Facebook groups. And I absolutely want to catch up with extended family once in a while. But Facebook and I are about to take an extended, quite possibly long-term, break. And I'm ---  feeling determined.

Tori

P.S. I know family in particular will want to see photos of Brooks. I'll be posting those on this blog from now on. I made it several years ago - might as well use it!